This I Believe

Draft 3

The soul really exists

Although living in the modern society where almost everything can be explained by the physical or chemical phenomenon, I believe there is a soul in life. Honestly, I have never met a soul before, but I still believe in its presence.

This is probably due to the influence of religion and my region of birth. In my country, especially in the North, many people, including my family, believe in or follow Buddhism. The Buddha said that souls exist and are influenced by causes and effects from things they do when they are alive. In particular, they will be punished in hell if they do a lot of bad things in their life. Meanwhile, they will continue their life in heaven if they do lots of good things (Thái, 2013). Therefore, I often think that people have owned their soul and can exist as a ghost in another world after death.

Besides my faith in the words of Buddha, I also listen to plenty of stories about the soul. For example, my English teacher, Huong, often told me about her father’s soul, i.e. her father always stands by her although he is dead. He became a soul and gave her a lot of advice. Sometimes, he recommended she should become a good person in society. Furthermore, I increasingly believe in the presence of the soul in our world when my mother told me that she can see or dream of my father. In fact, my dad died in a car accident, but he often meets my mom in her dreams. She told me that he is the same as he was alive and is still funny when talking about life in another world. Sometimes, he also reminds my mom of some future events, which suddenly become true.

In fact, I sometimes think the soul may be my imagination. Nonetheless, when watching television programs and reading scientific research, I know my belief is not wrong. Taking research from Sir Roger as an example, he said that people who temporarily die can release quantum information from the microtubules in the universe to a soul (Martin, 2016). Additionally, I also watch Ghost Lab on the Discovery channel. This program is an affirmation of the existence of invisible matter like the soul by using modern technology.

Whether true or false, I believe in the soul, like the presence of my father beside my mother and my family.

References

Martin, S. (2016). LIFE AFTER DEATH: Shock claim of evidence showing consciousness may continue as a SOUL. Expesss, Science. Retrieved from https://www.express.co.uk/news/science/728897/LIFE-AFTER-DEATH-consciousness-continue-SOUL

Thái, T. P. (2013). The Buddhist perspective on the soul. Kienthuc, Thien. Retrieved from http://kienthuc.net.vn/hoc/quan-diem-phat-giao-ve-linh-hon-va-nghiep-bao-192596.html

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Draft 2

The ghost really exists

Although living in modern society which almost things can be explained by physical or chemical phenomenon, I believe there is soul in life. Honestly, I have never met a soul before, but I still believe in the appearance of ghost until now.

This is probably the influence of religion and the region. In my country, especially in the North, many people, including my family, believe in or follow to Buddhism. The Buddha said that souls exist and are influenced by causes and effects from things they do when they are alive. Especially, they will be punished in hell if they do a lot of bad things in their life. Meanwhile, they will continue their life in heaven if they do lots good things. (Thái, 2013) Therefore, many people and I often think that we have own our soul and can exist as ghost in other world after death.

When I was younger, I also listen to plenty of stories about soul or ghost. For example, my English teacher, Huong, often told me about her father soul. That is, her father always stands by her although he died. He became a soul and gave her lot of advice. Sometimes, he recommended her should become good person for society. Because my teacher will be gone to heaven, then staying around family like him. Furthermore, I increasingly believe in the presence of ghost in our world when my mother told me that she can see or dream my father. In fact, my dad was gone in car accident, but he often meets my mom in her dream. She told that he is the same as he was alive and still funny when talking about life in another world. Sometimes, he also reminds my mom about some future events which become true suddenly and inadvertently.

Sometimes, I thought ghost as my imagination or not. Nonetheless, when watching refer television’s programs and scientific researches, I know my belief is not wrong. Taking research of Sir Roger as example, he said that person who temporarily dies can release quantum information from the microtubules to the universe a soul. (Martin, 2016) Additionally, I also watch Ghost lab on Discovery channel. This program is an affirmation of the existence of invisible matter as the ghost by using modern technology.

Whether true or false, I believe in the appearance of ghosts like existence of father besiding my mother, my family.

References

Martin, S. (2016). LIFE AFTER DEATH: Shock claim of evidence showing consciousness may continue as a SOUL. Expesss, Science. Retrieved from https://www.express.co.uk/news/science/728897/LIFE-AFTER-DEATH-consciousness-continue-SOUL

Thái, T. P. (2013). The Buddhist perspective on the soul. Kienthuc, Thien. Retrieved from http://kienthuc.net.vn/hoc/quan-diem-phat-giao-ve-linh-hon-va-nghiep-bao-192596.html

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Draft 1

The ghost really exists

Although living in modern society which almost things can be explained by physical or chemical phenomenon, I still believe there is soul in life. I do not remember ever since I had faith in that, but I think this can be affected by a part of environment, ideas as well as religion.

First, part of Vietnamese people in particular and Asian people in general often think people who have died can have existed soul. These souls can around and help them in many things. Therefore, they passed custom until now as ancestor worship. My home is no exception, my mother always does that to show her respect, remember to dead people, hoping their souls stand by family. I though, after death, they do not disappear, but exist in another form which cannot see by naked eyes. This believe is built through many stories about ghost from my family, neighbors and friends round me. Especially, after my father died, my mother told me that she often meets him in dream. In her dream, my dad is the same as he was alive, he is still funny when talking about life in another world. Sometimes, he also reminds my mom about some future events which become true suddenly and inadvertently.

Moreover, in The Buddhist perspective on the soul, The Buddha said that souls exist and are influenced by causes and effects from things they do when they are alive. For instance, their soul will be punished in hell if they do a lot of bad things in their life. Meanwhile, they can stay in heaven if they do lots good things. (Thái, 2013) In addition, according to my knowledge, Catholicism also offers the same view in doctrine.

Second, I believe in soul and ghost increasingly when watching refer television’s programs and scientific researches. Taking research of Sir Roger as example, he said that person who temporarily dies can release quantum information from the microtubules to the universe a soul. (Martin, 2016) Besides, Paul Robertson who is terminally-ill violinist claimed about the afterlife. He said he had seen death in near 17 times. (Martin, 2016) He is considered as proof of the existence of the soul. Furthermore, I also watch Ghost lab on Discovery channel. This program is an affirmation of the existence of invisible matter as the ghost by using modern technology.

Through what I hear, read, look, I believe in the presence of ghosts.

References

Martin, S. (2016). LIFE AFTER DEATH: Shock claim of evidence showing consciousness may continue as a SOUL. Expesss, Science. Retrieved from https://www.express.co.uk/news/science/728897/LIFE-AFTER-DEATH-consciousness-continue-SOUL

Thái, T. P. (2013). The Buddhist perspective on the soul. Kienthuc, Thien. Retrieved from http://kienthuc.net.vn/hoc/quan-diem-phat-giao-ve-linh-hon-va-nghiep-bao-192596.html

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5 thoughts on “This I Believe

  1. I think you have a great idea here although I found it a bit unclear as to what you really believe in. maybe you can link your points more to soul in life in each paragraph. Also I didn’t find it to be very authentic, I found you explained why others believe in this topic but not why you do. I feel it could have more flow I found it very difficult to follow.

  2. A little hard to read as there are lots of words missing and sentence structure is backwards in some cases. I personally, having come from a non religious family, find myself spacing out while reading as it is very focused on one audience. there are also some sentences that I can not find what they are referring to in the previous sentences. for example the third and forth sentences of the second paragraph.

  3. After reading your this I believe, I found the essay had some issues when you transitioned to a new paragraph for example the transition from your first paragraph to your second paragraph didn’t seem to transition easily. I found your essay to have community relevance but not everyone will feel the same way. At the end of your essay I found myself rethinking my beliefs on ghosts.

  4. I like your idea about believing in ghosts!! it’s interesting because not a lot of people like the idea of ghost because they are scary, but your ghost sounds nice because he is part of your family.
    Your sentences are sometimes hard to fallow because you are missing the odd word here and there so your flow could use a bit of work.
    Here is an example so you know what kind of words you might need to add. “Although living in modern society which almost *all* things can be explained by physical or chemical phenomenon, I still believe there is soul in life. I *don’t* remember *when* I *got* faith in that, but I think *it’s* affected by a part of environment, ideas,* as well as religion”.
    I like how you can talk about your country in this story but you never actually mention which country that is, so maybe you could tell the reader exactly what country you’re from.
    You also have a lot of connecting words that aren’t necessary like *furthermore* *additionally* *sometimes* *meanwhile* *nonetheless*. When you use big words like that in every paragraph to connect your sentences it loses your narrative voice and makes the reader tired of reading sometimes.
    You have good structure here right now just maybe get someone to read over it and fix some grammar for you. If you want I can some time :).

  5. You need to go to tutoring services to get some help with the grammar in this essay. It is very hard to understand because not all of the sentences make sense or there are words that should be used differently. This has to be addressed to get a good mark on the essay.
    As for content: you need to work on the transitions between paragraphs. The idea from one paragraph needs to link to the next paragraph to give the essay coherence. It is unclear whether you believe that humans have a soul that lives on after death or whether you believe in ghosts. They are not necessarily the same thing. You need to be more clear as to what you belief actually is.

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